Finding myself in the lost world..

Friday, June 15, 2012

Choices...

[7:16 pm]

Met up with V for lunch earlier on when she came over to settle some work-related matters. Even though we have not seen each other for a while, my heart still skips a beat whenever I see her. I don't know why, but she continues to have the ability to captivate me. Despite the fact that things are back to normal between us, I know that it can't and will never be the same again. For starters, she has gotten back together with the ex-boyfriend after a hiatus of a year or so. Even though she yearns to get married, the fact that the boyfriend is not financially stable speaks volumes about their state of relationship. For me, there are 2 potential women in my life now. V is one of them and the other is a long-time friend of mine. V may be attached, but so long as she isn't married, there will always be a chance. The other woman, while we have known each other for a while, there are currently no sparks between us. We are hanging out as friends and there are mutual understanding between us. If things do develop between both of us, it's a bonus. Comparatively, both women have their own merits. For V, it's her sweet, caring, considerate nature and her kind heart. But she is emotionally dependent and may not be able to take care of herself. For the other one, even though we have known each other for a while, I also don't know much about her. But for starters, I know she is emotionally independent and is able to take care of herself. She is more matured and knows what she wants in life. Both have their own merits and I know both will make a good spouse. Isn't it funny that I am good at charting out my own career path, but I am not good at working out what I want in my relationships? Like what my Financial Planner mentioned to me the other day, what do I really want? Am I looking for a girlfriend or a wife? Do I want somebody who makes my heart skips a beat and bring me on an emotional roller coaster ride all the time or am I looking for someone who is emotionally stable and is able to take care of the family? What do I really want?

Labels: Random Thots

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