Sunday, April 29, 2012

Still infatuated...

[12:26 am]


Why am I still infatuated with her after so long?

My thoughts still drift towards her whenever I am driving or I am not pre-occupied with work. Friends all around has often chided me for being foolish as there's no way that we will be together as long as her thoughts are sorted out. It's a lost cause, they said.

But, perhaps, like every human being, we always harbour hope that everything will eventually turn out well; For she is a wonderful lady. And when a lady is that special, you know it sooner than you think possible. You recognize it instinctively, and you’re certain that no matter what happens, there will never be another one like her.

Until I find someone who is as wonderful as her, I doubt I will really be able to move on....perhaps I should really send in the application for Emirates and Cathay Pacific and be stationed overseas. Only that way will I really be able to forget her totally...



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Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Updates...

[12:26 am]


Haven't been writing much partly due to work commitments and some much needed break in Malaysia and Bangkok.

The emotional aspects of me seems to be healing even though sometimes I still think of V. This is despite the fact that a younger girl has been giving me plenty of attention; she texts me almost everyday on BBM for close to a month and we went out on a few lunch and dinner dates together. She did make me flutter abit with her whining (ok, I must admit that girls who knows when and how to whine will really melt me). But alas, things didn't work out between us and she has ignored me since.

If you ask me what's the difference between V and this young one, I can say that both have their own strengths. V has a caring and passionate nature but lacks the emotional stability and self-confidence whereas young girl has the self-confidence and an outspoken nature but lacks a caring and passionate nature.

Perhaps its a test for me; one which inculcates a lesson that no one is perfect, that you gain some, you lose some. But every now and then, I’d meet a girl and think that we were getting along great, and suddenly I’d stop hearing from her. I didn’t understand it and I still don’t. It bothers me and it hurts me. With time, it got harder and harder to keep blaming the girls, and I eventually came to the conclusion that there was something wrong with me. That maybe I was simply meant to live my life alone.

Recently I went to pray and seek God's guidance on this issue. God told me I will definitely be married, but when asked which girl (I gave God 3 names and asked whether it was any of them), God gave me 2 answers. Till now, I still wonder why both of them. But one thing I know for sure, that both girls are similar in nature and have their strengths and weaknesses.

Perhaps, I should let nature take its course and hang out abit more.




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Finding A World Of My Own

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