One must always learn to keep one's options open and not be fixated on just one option. So this was what your friend has advised as you met up for dinner after a long flight back from Germany. You were reminded by your aging body that long flights aren't your domain anymore. Despite the long flight, it was made comfortable by the caring cabin crew which you chatted with to fight off the boredom.

You have digressed.

It's never easy to balance school and work, especially in the first quarter of the year when you have to hand in the 4 mandatory school assignments, write two corporate strategy papers, craft out the training budget and department scorecard while preparing for the Germany trip. Despite these busy times, the social part of you have been kept busy.

While these social aspects have allowed you to know more people, it lacked the sense of connectivity and familiarity which you sought. Indeed, as your friend rightfully pointed out, to build that sense of connectivity will take repeated interactions. You can be quite discerning when it comes to people but for someone to enter your inner circle takes plenty of trust and effort.

So you shall see how the social circle goes.

 

It has been a long week of work over in Germany as you visited the potential partner's factory, products and spoke to their technical people. A typical day would start early and end late as the Germans hosted the delegation to traditional Bavarian dinner, complete with their famous beer and schnapps.

This was the first time you have been brought along on this trip with the bosses and you had great exposure to how businesses are negotiated and conducted at the highest levels together with the Government officials. Through interactions with the different parties, you learnt a lot in terms of their advanced technology which put many at home to shame.

But all work and no play would make Jack a dull boy. In between serious work, you had the opportunity to immerse in the German history as the host brought the delegation on sight-seeing tours of Nuremberg and Munich. Even though there was light snow and the weather seldom climbed above 13 degrees, it was an eye-opening visit.

All in all, you have learnt a lot and hope it will stand you in good stead as you proceed on this alternate path.

Had a weird dream last night and you thought maybe you should articulate it before the day's work throws you off-balance.

While it wasn't those fantasy dreams you once shared with J about, which led to some interesting moments, this dream revolved around her. It was a random thing where you bumped into her and just updated each other about their respective happenings these days. Even though it was cordial, it was still somewhat strained as both parties basically broad-brushed it through.

But what was vivid in your memory was when she mentioned about heading to Melbourne for a trip and you "innocently" questioned her readiness to skip school and head off for holiday. Even though the alarm clock jostled you awake as always before you have had a response, it somehow struck you that the memories of her still resides deep within you, hidden among the layers of fat.

In real life, you know this ain't going to happen as both of you are staying away from each other, to prevent any sparks from flying. Even though you don't know whether she does dream of you, but your thoughts do drift to those ingrained memories shared with her at times. But you are only human and it's a natural thing to dream. Anyway dreams are just dreams. 

It has been a very busy week as you rushed to complete all the necessary arrangements for an upcoming business trip. This is on top of your already over-whelming work which demands you to stay ahead of the power curve.

Given that your mind is constantly on work, your attendance in school has suffered. You have missed a couple of learning opportunities as you worked overtime to stay on top of the game. While you have missed the classes, you also felt that you have slackened in your studies as the weekends are spent fighting the war of assignments instead of revising.

Indeed, time can be your worst enemy as you try your best to prioritize everything that is demanding a piece of you. While there's more pieces of you these days, you would rather keep yourself leaner as you head towards the mid-30s mark. Since you are the age topic, it seems like the standard question of you settling down is never far from everybody's minds.

It's getting so bad these days that friends are starting to push their single female friends into the fire-pit by setting up blind dates for you. While it's awkward in the beginning, you have to remind yourself that it's in the name of knowing more people. Ultimately, getting into a committed relationship depends on many factors such as values, outlook in life, trust and the most important thing to you; communication.

You have learnt the hard way and you certainly don't want to repeat the same mistake again. For such mistakes are very detrimental to the emotional and social health.  

You sat by your favourite stretch of ECP, nursing a half-pint Hoegaarden with a Kindle in your hand. Watching the endless stream of aircraft on finals towards the airport, listening to the waves crashing against the shore and feeling the sea breeze coursing through your hair brought you a sense of zen.

As you savoured the sea breeze, you saw happy families with kids playing by the sea and couples running in cadence as they burnt off the calories of CNY. You were filled with a tinge of loneliness and sadness as you could had been one of them.

But like what your bff mentioned, you ruined your own happiness by your actions and you concurred. You couldn't give her the security that she needed. But the only saving grace is that she is now happily married and living a life of bliss. She must be now up north visiting both sets of relatives and enjoying herself. Well, as long she is happy with what she has chosen, nothing is more important.

The only thing you can do as you looked at the happy families and couples is to remind yourself not to let the same thing happen again. And the most important thing is to give the other half the security she needs.